


Loose Lips

by ohmytheon



Series: Rebelcaptain AUs [1]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Assassins & Hitmen, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Mr. & Mrs. Smith Fusion, F/M, Feelings, Minor Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-20 12:35:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9491162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmytheon/pseuds/ohmytheon
Summary: At the end of the day, their marriage had been just one big cover to hide the fact that both of them were assassins without the other knowing...wasn't it?





	

Cassian slammed her brusquely against the column, not enough to bring attention to them on the dance floor, but enough to force her to snap her eyes back to him. Once Jyn connected eyes with him, she couldn’t look away. There was an intensity in his eyes that she both longed for and feared, the same look in his eyes back when they had met years ago while both of them were running away from authorities on separate missions. It was dangerous and heart-thumping, but not cold, as one might imagine an assassin’s would be.

No, Cassian was all about passion – or he had been back then and maybe he was now. She wondered where it had gone, if he’d smothered the flames intentionally or she’d done it accidentally. It had never been in her nature to accept blame without a fight, but she could see where she might’ve done wrong, him as well. Neither of them fit for married life, only secrets, and a true marriage did not thrive on secrets.

Was she even capable of that? Was Cassian? She didn’t know. In fact, she barely knew him at all, despite being marriage to him for years. She’d found that out the hard, painful way when they’d nearly killed one another in their shared home. But having sex with him afterwards, even this tense dance now, had felt so familiar and made her feel alive. She wanted to know more of that Cassian, the same man she had thought she might’ve fallen in love with, if she was capable of such a thing.

“I understand it now,” Cassian told her before he dropped her back into a dip, leaving her neck terribly vulnerable to him. He leaned down, his breath hot on her skin, before abruptly jerking her back up into a strict dancing posture. Despite their rigged moves on the dance floor, they gripped each other’s hands tightly, painfully, like they were either afraid of losing the other if they let go or losing some sort of power struggle silently playing out between them.

“Understand what?” Jyn asked coolly as they deftly spun on the dance floor, the two of them in their own little world together.

Cassian’s lips quirked into a grin that was a tad bitter, but it vanished quickly. To admit any emotions right now would be a show of defeat. It was a cruel game that both of them were used to playing. "Why our marriage fell apart.“

Jyn raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. She was good at being silent. Helped whenever she was faced with torture. Their marriage counseling and the painful divide between them had been close enough to interrogation. Instead, she let him guide her, following his every move, not one second out of sync. For a moment, she could breathe in their synchronization.

“You were so _cold_ ,” Cassian said as he slid a hand up her thigh. Her breath hitched for a second before he found the knife she kept hidden and rid her of it. There had been nothing cold about that. “You treated our marriage like it was a job, nothing more.”

“It was difficult to treat it like anything other than that when you were always absent,” Jyn pointed out. He narrowed his eyes. Two could play this game.

It was true that she had started to shut him out, but it only got noticeable once he started coming home hours after she’d set up dinner. True, it had been because he was working – and she, of all people, would’ve understood that had she known – but it had hurt. She hadn’t like that he was capable of hurting her by merely missing an anniversary dinner when she’d been shot and stabbed multiple times while on the job. So she’d hurt him the only way she knew how that didn’t involve killing him: she emotionally distanced herself from him.

Cassian stiffened as she slid down him, running her hands down his side, until she found a hidden weapon on his ankle. She brushed up against the front of him on the way up, giving him an look daring him to question her motives, but he merely pulled her against him, making her pulse race. “You can’t miss a cover. That’s what I was. A cover to hide the truth, a way to escape that you got wrapped up in.”

“Wasn’t I?” Jyn countered.

When Cassian didn’t respond immediately, merely staring down at her with unreadable dark eyes, Jyn’s heart bottomed out in her chest. It was the same feeling she got whenever Cassian had come home that first night smelling like another woman’s perfume. Confusion, anger, and pain swelled up inside of her and she didn’t know what to make of it. She’d never felt like that before - had never given anyone the power to make her feel that before – and it had _hurt_.

It was too much and she was too out in the open to feel such things. She was afraid she’d lose it and do something drastic in front of all these people. “I–” She pulled her hands out of his and, despite his loose grip, he let her go. Like he didn’t want to hold on. Like he wanted her to leave. Tears didn’t well up in her eyes like they might’ve done to someone else, but the urge to destroy did cross her mind. “I have to go.”

She took a step away from him and then another and then she was gone. She left the room, making it into the hallway towards the elevators, not really sure of her destination, when she felt strong hands pull at her and all but shove her into the wall. Her first instinct was to attack back – how could she have been so foolish as to let her guard down in a time like this? – but then a familiar cologne wafted over her and Cassian came into view. She looked at him, somewhat begrudgingly, but then softened when she saw how open Cassian’s face was. In all their time together, she had never seen him look like this. Only then did she notice that they were finally alone.

“You were a cover,” Cassian admitted, “at first. But then you… I do not know what came over me. I am not an impulsive man. It is why I have stayed alive as long as I have in this business. You were different yet…”

“Familiar,” Jyn breathed. “I’d never so connected to someone before. I didn’t think it was possible.”

“Neither did I.” Cassian loosened his grip on her, but he didn’t let her go and he didn’t step away from her either. She didn’t want him to. “My life was the job – is the job – and then I met you and saw other possibilities.”

Jyn tilted her chin up. “Do you still want those possibilities?”

Cassian moved like he was going to kiss her, but stopped centimeters short of her lips. Both of them closed their eyes, despite what all of their training told them not to do. “Only if they are with you.”


End file.
